Personal Training Couple Shares The Secret For A Working Marriage
By admin
Today is a special day. 4 years ago, today, I said “I do” to a wonderful man. (Note to Dan… Yes, we’ve been married 4 years).
To be honest, it’s not really 4 years that I celebrate. Dan and I have been together for almost a decade and I’m pretty proud of that. We’ve seen couples come and go. We’ve been tested ourselves over the years, yet neither of us feels there is anything so bad that we can’t work through it.
As Dan put it one time, marriage might be tough, but there isn’t anyone else he would want to fight with or love.
What’s the secret to a happy marriage?
Honestly, I don’t know.
There are happy days, crappy days, and amazing days. There are days when I just want to kill him and days when I can’t wait to have him wrap his arms around me.
I don’t know if there is such a thing as a happy marriage, feelings are ever changing. Instead, I like to think of it as a working marriage.
We work. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.
I guess the real question then is…
What’s The Secret For A Working Marriage?
For us, it’s our fitness.
I know for each couple it’s different. For many, it’s Christ, good sex, or communication. All of which are unquestionably important. And I’m sure, this list can go on.
But for us, it’s exercise. It’s the glue that holds us together and what helps us focus on all the important elements of a workable marriage listed above.
Fitness Is Our Matrimonial Glue
It’s our shared passion
Dan and I were both into working out when we first met and it’s something that bonded us from the start. We would share workout tips, and it was something we would do together.
In fact, he’s the reason I got into weight lifting and I like to say I’m the reason he got into trail running and obstacle courses (not that we do them often, but it’s something we enjoy).
We each brought a different passion to the table and brought the other person in.
It makes us individuals, not just Taylor and Dan the couple.
While we enjoy being active together, it’s also what we do when we need a break from one another.
Fitness provides the “me time” everyone wants. The desire and requirement to be away from your spouse shouldn’t make anyone feel guilty, it’s a real necessity.
I LOVE to run, Dan doesn’t. And I don’t want him to. I love having this hobby that is just mine. That I can do on my own, there is no competition or pressure. It’s just me. Me, me, me. I love that.
And he has his own fitness goals too, which I don’t want to be apart of. For example, he loves working with sandbags. Me? Not so much.
While fitness brings us together, it also keeps us as individuals. I enjoy being me, and sometimes I don’t want to be referred to as Taylor AND Dan, but just Taylor. You know?
I mean, we look so much a like, and we’re together so often that we get grouped together, individuality is key to a working marriage!
It’s our job.
Not many couples have the option to work together, and if they did, many wouldn’t.
I get asked all the time how is it possible to work with your spouse every. single. day.
Do we ever want to kill each other? Oh yes, often.
Do we argue? Yum, you don’t want to be around us when we’re filming, just a word to the wise.
Sometimes, I even wonder how we do it. But we do. And I wouldn’t change it for the world. You know that feeling when you accomplish something great?
Now thinking about that feeling x2 because you did it with your significant other. It’s double the celebration. It’s also double the downfall when bad things happen, but that’s not the point of this… so scratch that.
Plus Dan and I train completely different. We’re like water and oil with our training designs and methods. Which is great, we come up with some pretty awesome workouts when we combine styles.
Fitness is our art, our way to share our creative brains.
*But truth be told, our secret to working together is that we don’t often work together. We message and email ideas back and forth a lot. I have my jobs, he has his and I work at my gym several days a week so that we’re not in each other’s personal space every day.
It’s how we show our love.
I’ve mentioned this several times before, and I’ll share it again today (because it’s a special day):
I workout not only for myself but to look good for my husband.
I want to look better as we grow old together and not let myself go. I want him to always be proud of me and my body. Sure it’s MY body but he has to look at it too, right? Some may disagree and say he loves me for me, which he does but that doesn’t mean he has to look at me 50 pounds heavier and out of shape.
And he works hard to be sexy for me. Which, I can’t complain. He’s got a rock solid body.
And of course, sex is important to a marriage. Staying in shape gives us confidence in the bedroom. TMI? I don’t think so.
And finally,
It’s our way to stay sane with one another.
To quote the oh so wise Elle Woods:
Truer words have never been spoken.
Research has shown that exercise helps increase dopamine levels in the brain helping to lift our mood. It’s a great way to handle anxiety, stress, depression, and all the other negative emotions that come from day to day life… including from marriage.
As a woman who has a history of anxiety, I can say that without exercise I am a big mess.
I’m always on an emotional roller coaster as is, and I’m pretty sure Dan is thankful every day that I am on the Mine Train (kiddie coaster at Disney World) each day thanks to my workout regiment instead of the Golliath (crazy ride at Six Flags).
Sanity definitely helps a marriage work. Thank you fitness for keeping us both a bit more sane than we would be without you.
Dan, I love you with all of my heart and I can’t wait for many more anniversaries.
Okay, enough corny chat for the day! And sorry for the overload of mushy pictures! One last for #TBT from 2009!
