Men Are From Mars, Women From Venus, Vegans Are From Planet PX42?
By admin
I have a very special guest post for you today. It happens to be from my favorite person ever… my husband, Dan. You’ve read all about him in my previous posts and now you get to hear his point of view about living with a vegan. Enjoy it and let me know what you think (plus, it will make him feel awesome too!)
And here’s Dan…
I almost held a disdain for vegans in the past, which I’ll explain…
But just a zippy intro about myself. Besides Taylor, I love only a few other things. One of those is surfing.
Surfing is amazing. It’s also how I discovered what vegan meant. Brian Connelly was his name. He’s a great surfer and about as free as a spirit can be.
I remember when I was about 18 or so seeing him on an interview with Surfer Magazine. He talked about being vegan and he was holding this huge bag of almonds, cashews, and walnuts.
He explained what being vegan meant to him. I don’t remember it. All I remember was learning that being vegan means you can’t eat anything animal based. So if you wanted to drink milk… too bad… it came from an animal. (Don’t worry, milk is an unnatural drink. Another article topic for later.)
I couldn’t get over the fact that somebody would live like that. Just look in your mouth, you have some pretty sharp teeth right?
Those are for shredding and devouring meat!
I thought vegans were like super duper animal activists that get mad when you blow smoke in a dogs face… I never did that just to be clear… but those same activists light one up in a bar and blow smoke all over other peoples faces.
It was just a “thing” to make you feel special.
Imagine My Face When Taylor Tells Me She’s Going Vegan
Keep in mind back when I first learned about veganism, I was 18. I didn’t even know Taylor then and I was some punk teenager – know it all – as well.
****Quick Aside Start****
Taylor is an amazing cook. I’ve eaten at five start restaurants in Charleston, where we live, and she still cooks better. Maybe except Jasmine’s Porch on Kiawah Island.
The point is she cooks me dinner nearly every night. So what she cooks, I – kind of – have to eat.
****Quick Aside End****
However, when she told me she wanted to go vegan I was all about it. I’m a personal trainer too and I love to test and experiment. I thought it would be really cool to test how it felt.
After all, how bad could it get? (That’s the death question… never ever ask that question.)
Then Taylor Made Vegan Spinach Quiche
I love children. I hope one day to have a couple rug rats. I’ve also have had the “privilege” of changing some ratty diapers… emphasis the ratty part.
No Joke…
Changing diapers was a more pleasant than eating this quiche.
After that quiche I thought I had just entered the seventh circle of hell.
This all brings me too…
What It’s Like To Live With A Vegan
****Spoiler Alert****
Obviously it’s not that bad or else I would have divorced her arse…
AHHHHH… I’m kidding… I’m kidding!
****Spoiler Alert End****
In the beginning it was terrible. I actually lost about 9 pounds because eating was like the Chinese water torture.
A slow miserable drip of plant based pain smacking me in the mouth.
But if there is one thing you can count on, it’s Taylor learning fast and then making things like the Magic Kingdom… amazing, special, full of Disney glitter and amazement.
And she did.
Suddenly her dinners started to taste really good. Not only that, but they looked really good too.
Her vegan veggieballs I thought were real meat balls. I even asked when she was cooking them, “Taylor… that looks amazing. What are YOU going to eat?”
Come to find out those little suckers were packed with flavor that makes chewing real meatballs feel like the consistency of what I would imagine boiled buffalo testes to be like. Based completely upon what I’ve seen on the Food Network.
I don’t even know what that means but it doesn’t compare to her vegan veggieballs.
And it doesn’t end there…
Taylor’s vegan burritos. Yikes! I can’t even think about how to describe them. All I can say is if you’ve ever driven down I95 from Virginia to the South Carolina border, you have no doubt seen the hundreds of “South of the Border” billboards.
I mean every mile there’s a billboard… no joke. (Seriously there are over 100 billboards you’ll see!)
Well they need to replace those hundreds of billboards and just slap these burritos on them and then Taylor and I can host a huge vegan burrito festival… because they are that darn good!
Plus look at these vegan cakes… I mean come on!
Bottom Line: I’m Practically Vegan Now
I’ll bring my rambling to a close soon. But bottom line, living with a vegan is awesome.
From some punk teenager kid thinking that a surfing hero was flippin out of his gourd… TRANSFORMED… to a vegan lover and full supporter of the lifestyle.
So you might be wondering… “Dan… why aren’t you vegan?”
Great question!
Are you ready for 600 more words?
AHHHHHHH… I’m kidding… I’m kidding!
There are only a few things keeping me back from being vegan.
- I love eggs. I love egg sandwiches. I love omelets. etc…
- I love deli style – completely natural of course – sandwiches. Nothing is better than preservative free turkey breast with lettuce, humus, thick tomato, and some olives… draped elegantly in olive oil and vinegar.
As the Kool Aid man would say… Oh Yeah!
But other than that, I’ve had zero craving for chicken, steak, you name it.
You might be thinking… “Dan, what about those sharp teeth?”
I guess all I can say is…
All the better to shred up some veggies!